Signs They’re Serious: How to Spot Genuine Intentions Online

In today’s digital dating world, meeting someone online is easier than ever. From social media DMs to dating apps like Match Naija, connections can spark in seconds. But while starting a conversation is easy, figuring out if someone is truly serious—or just passing the time—can be tricky.

Let’s face it: no one wants to spend their time, energy, and feelings on a relationship that isn’t going to endure. So, how can you determine if someone has sincere intentions or if they’re messing around? Here are the leading indicators to watch for when identifying genuine intentions online.

1. They’re Consistent in Their Communication

One of the most significant indicators of genuine interest is consistent communication. You will know someone is interested in you romantically because they will strive to talk to you constantly—not just when it’s convenient for them.

• They don’t disappear for days without explanation.
• They follow up when they say they will.
• Their tone stays respectful and engaged, not hot today and cold tomorrow.

💡 Red flag: If they disappear for days and then reappear with a nonspecific explanation, it indicates that you’re not a priority for them.

2. They Want to Know the Real You

A person with genuine intentions will ask meaningful questions. They’re curious about your values, goals, and past experiences—not just your looks or what you wear in your profile picture.

They might ask things like:

• “What are you passionate about?”
• “Where do you see yourself in five years?”
• “What does an ideal relationship look like for you?”

They listen and remember details, which is a green flag when someone mentions something you said last week.

💡 Red flag: If every conversation circles back to sex or superficial compliments, they’re likely not looking for anything serious.

3. They’re Honest About Their Intentions

Someone who knows what they want will state it upfront. It may not be within the first 10 minutes. Still, soon enough, they’ll tell you if they’re looking for a relationship, friendship, or something casual.

A serious person will be clear and won’t leave you confused.

• “I’m here to meet someone I can build with.”
• “I’m not into games—I’m looking for something long-term.”

💡 Red flag: If they dodge the question or give vague answers like “let’s see where it goes,” they may not know what they want—or worse, don’t want you to know.

4. They Respect Your Boundaries

When someone truly respects and values you, they’ll also respect your emotional, physical, or digital boundaries.

• They don’t pressure you for private photos or personal details too early.
• They’re patient if you want to take things slowly.
• They don’t get upset if you say no or need time.

Respect is a significant indicator of serious intentions. People in it for the long haul want to build trust—not rush it.

💡 Red flag: If someone pushes you to move faster than you’re comfortable, they prioritize their wants over your comfort.

5. They Want to Meet in Person (When Safe)

Meeting offline is the natural next step for people genuinely interested in building relationships. Once trust is established, they’ll want to go beyond texting or video calls.

They’ll suggest a date, even if it’s a casual one:

• “Would you like to meet for coffee this weekend?”
• “Let’s walk at [insert local park].”

💡 Red flag: If weeks go by and they never bring up the meeting or always find an excuse to cancel, it might mean they’re hiding something (or someone).

6. They Talk About the Future (Including You)

Someone with serious intentions will include you in their future thinking. It doesn’t have to be marriage talk right away, but they might say things like:

• “I’d love to take you to that concert next month.”
• “I’ve been thinking of traveling to your city sometime soon.”

It shows they’re imagining a future with you in it—not just a chat buddy for today.

💡 Red flag: If they avoid any long-term topics or talk only in the now, they may not be looking beyond today.

7. They’re Transparent About Their Life

A serious person will open up about their life, not just surface-level info. Over time, they’ll share stories about their family, work, and past relationships (without oversharing or badmouthing exes).

They might even video call with you from their home, introduce you to friends, or suggest following each other on social media.

💡 Red flag: Be careful if they’re overly secretive or you still don’t know their real name, job, or location after weeks of chatting.

8. Their Words Match Their Actions

The most important sign of all is that they do what they say. A person with good intentions follows through.

• If they say they’ll call at 7 PM, they do.
• If they say they’re looking for something real, they behave accordingly.

Actions speak louder than emojis.

💡 Red flag: Repeated empty promises and last-minute cancellations show flaky or insincere behavior.

9. They Don’t Rush the Relationship

People who are serious about you are willing to take their time. They won’t push for intimacy too quickly or try to claim you as their partner after two conversations.

They recognize that genuine connections are developed over time.

💡 Red flag: Be cautious of love bombing—over-the-top praise, gifts, or professes of love shortly after the meeting. While it may seem charming, it is frequently a tactic of manipulation.

10. They Make You Feel Safe and Valued

Ultimately, it’s not just what someone says or does—how they make you feel.

• Do you feel respected?
• Do you feel heard?
• Do you feel at ease?

Learn to listen to your inner calmness and trust that you know who is good for you and who isn’t.

Trust your gut. If spending time with them constantly makes you feel terrible, they are not right for you.

🧠 Final Thoughts

Remember, you deserve intentionality, love, peace, patience. So, don’t settle for crumbs when looking for a feast.

Stay bright, open, and, most importantly, true to yourself.

Also read: Top 10 First Date Ideas in Nigeria (That Won’t Break the Bank)